Happiness: If P than Q analysis

They say happiness makes a person live longer.

(read in Ben Stein professor mode)

Happiness is an emotional or affective state that feels good or pleasing. Overlapping states or experiences associated with happiness include wellbeing, joy, sexual pleasure, delight, health, safety, contentment, and love, while contrasting ones include suffering, sadness, grief, anxiety, and pain. Happiness is often correlated to the presence of favorable events (such as a promotion, a marriage, lottery winnings, etc.) and the absence of troubles or bad luck -such as accidents, getting fired, divorce, conflicts, etc.
(reliable source)


ehem.

How to live a life of "happiness?"

Positive attitude.

A positive attitude is acquired when one is high.

scratch that.

A positive attitude comes when one is giddy.

I become giddy when I am hyper...

I am only hyper when I have had my Starbucks beverage of choice.

with 4 shots of expresso.

Caffeine = state of euphoria or happiness.

75% of the pp I know are generally good natured or 'happy' people.

I belong to a minority who calls themselves realists also known as the modern day pessimists.

Pessimists tend to be sarcastic and miserable human beings

Sarcasm does not equal happiness

------> I am screwed.

3am rants

... I need a new phone.

This is getting serious. I was stuck on a bus for 2.5 hours without texting. and I still have to answer the all important question of 'how do you say 'like' in hebrew.'... eh.

Drunk people are pathetic.

I hate relationships where you have to force yourself to talk to the person.
Shouldn't it be effortless?
Shouldn't I want it to work?

Why are the Republicans going to lose Congress gosh darnit!

Puking

Courtesy of Bobmedo/Flickr.