Yehudiya

Over the course of my life, I've met two pp whose non-cynical views on religion have made a (thus far) lasting impression on me.

It's tough sometimes, being lazy and all, not wanting to pick up a siddur and daven, not knowing whether there's someone, something on the other side.

It's true I've never really thought of myself as having an issue with belief, but then i started hanging out with this one asshole who questioned everything.

He's an average ex-yeshiva kid, stopped wearing the black hat post-hs, working in accounting, and he's young. Which most definitely accounts for his devil no care, cynical, daniel? downer view on religion. He's questioned everything I believe in regarding religion, and I can no longer say I have complete Emunah. And trying to turn the clock backwards is proving to be a struggle.

Over vacation this year, in a totally non-spiritually conducive local, I spoke with this great, great kid, who's every other word, was b"h. Complete 180 from Mr. cynical.

"I'm in school now, b"h, I'm here with my family, b"h, I"m going to Israel to join a combat unit, b"H"

So Lost, obviously being intrigued by this (ridiculously good looking) really religious fellow, starting shmoozing with the antithesis of cynical. He loooves Yiddishkeit. He wants to learn for the rest of his life. Everything he does is for G-d. Eating, sleeping, working out, going to the army.

I thought he was totally loony.
"Mr. Gorgeous Jew, you know most pp I know, and our age especially, are either completely cynical when it comes to religion, or apathetic."

"I know, they don't see how beautiful the Torah is, and how beautiful Yiddishkeit is."

Oy. When I'm looking for Mr. MO, middle of the road religious, I find him instead.

Never really got to speak to him, and ask him all the questions I would've wanted to, either way I think speaking to him would be a bad idea. I'm too negative and cynical to be around sunny pp like him.

Inspiration #2 is in the form of a neighbor, him and his wife are baal teshuvot and friends of my parents for a couple of years now.
When we walk home from Shul, he's always hocking about the gadlus of nature, how I should get married, how the Shabbos should be sanctified.

Everyone just smiles, mumbles under their breath incoherently... baal tshuvot.

This past shabbos, he started talking about Emunah, and I started walking faster towards home,... "LOOST, Emunah is the cornerstone of the world, you have to take a step back when you're davening and think about how you're praying before the creator of the universe, the artist of our world."

"Mr. Neighbor, what would say to one who is a cynic, who doesn't believe there is a gd? Who doesn't trust in a gd?"

"That's what Gateways is about, lost."

And I'm off.